Friday, November 20, 2009

Going out

The TBL crew is going out tonight. Thought I'd throw a post up to get your mindset right when hitting the clubs.

This is quoted from Ratisse's ebook "Private confessions."
Mindset going into a club

I'm here to have fun. I'm here to provide value in the form of fun. I talk to lots of people. Those guys standing there clutching thier drinks, hoping something cools happens? Yeah, I'm here to brighten there day. I believe that these women love sex and they want some cool guy to take them home. Yeah, I'm that guy.

Tools and things I look for

When I'm walking around the club I scan for AI (attraction Indicators). When I see it from a girl I want to approach, I immediately go approach her, unless I'm in set with some other girls. I like approaching girls I get AI from because that phase of building attraction is already taken care of for me. I just have to maintain it to ramp it up.

When I'm in set with a girl I am constantly using my body language in a dominant, yet comfortable way for multiple purposes. One thru push/pull to keep her on her toes. I will show semi-disinterest through body language as a tool to show her she hasn't won me over. (Ex: While I'm speaking to her I am scanning the oom for AI from other girls). This example is powerful because it helps me on multiple levels.
1) By us being together, she is social proofing me to other girls which I can approach later.
2) I see these AI's from those girls so I know who to approach later.
3) Since I'm going ADD on her a bit, she now fights to get my attention back by touching me.
4) Shows that I'm not fully invested in this interaction and may leave at any moment.

After isolating, I drop in one or two stories from my life that will help build a stronger emotional connection with a girl.

Throughout the set I'm constantly priming a girl in order to do a couple things.
1) It lets her know where I'm directing this interaction.
2) It acts as a road map for me, telling me where I'm at in the interaction. (Ex: I tell a girl that "If we continue talking, we are going to end up making out.") In this example, her nonverbal reaction to what I've said gives me feedback as to how attracted to me she is, where I'm at in the interaction, and if I can proceed with what I just stated.

Finally, state control. I do my best to be that solid rock that waves crash upon. I try to project that no matter what she does or says, that she is not going to fuck my state up and make me crumble. I'm going to stay being this guy that's having a lot of fun.

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