Wednesday, December 16, 2009

The Bachelor's Guide to Boy Toys (Part 6)

Cool Dog
Girl Gain: +5%




Cost: Purch: $0-500
A cool dog is defined as: Adorable, does NOT shit/piss on the floor. Does NOT make your house smell, or otherwise grossify it with excess hair/mud/chewed things and furniture.  If your dog has any or all of these traits, you are getting a net woman LOSS at all times.

Cost: Monthly: $50-100     Alpo and Vet visits aren't free.

Age ranges:
Five to Eighteen:     Everyone has pets at this age. Net neutral for women.

Eighteen to Thirty:     You show you are a protector of loved ones (your dog, but she'll correlate it to her and you guys' kids).  You know how to put your foot down enough to train a dog correctly because he can fetch, and doesn't shit on your floor.  If he does, you are a pussy and kind of gross with low value because you allow it.  If you have a good dog, then you can take him and her with you in your Jeep to reinforce your cool/outdoors/adventurous cred.  The dog doesn't GET you girls, but he might in some instances help you open girls or have girls open you if you travel with him a lot.  Dog parks are great for this. Add an additional +5% if he can catch frisbees.

Thirty to Sixty:  This dog gives you instant comfort with women your age, but no help with younger women.  Helps offset weirdness if you come off as creepy/weird or are very physically unattractive.  Also gives you a reason to go to dog parks/public places and not be the weird older guy walking around by himself.  Additionally, you will get opened by similar aged women at the pet store/etc.  Remember to use your dog as a conversation piece to build rapport.

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