Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Twenty Seconds




Saw this post on a women's dating blog.  It's a woman talking about how they know within twenty seconds if they are going to sleep with you or not.

"We know within 20 seconds. no, we don't know if we will marry you. But, we do know if we will have sex with you.
I can personally see a man on the street, look at him without having spoken a word to him, and know if i would have sex with him. If a woman has a general idea of what she is physically attracted to in a man, its an easy 20 second thought process. She looks, she contemplates, and she decides. Several guys i know could get it, based solely on attractiveness. It's when they start talking that the problems happen, but that is a whole 'nother blog."


Spoke to a few trusted female friends and they all confirmed this to be absolutely true 90% of the time.

Holy shit!

What does this mean to the game crowd? Does this mean game isn't important? I thought men were visual and women were emotional/verbal. So it actually IS all about looks?

Settle down. It is, but it isn't. Twenty seconds is a LONG time really. A guy knows if he's attracted in under five seconds. Here's the twenty second process for a woman:

I see him. :
1) Am I surprised by him in some way (we physically bump into each other, he pokes/playfully  pushes/evokes an instant physical sensation that immediately creates sexual tension in my body that I can FEEL) If yes, then shortcut to attracted. If no, then begin logical evaluation.

2) Is he healthy looking? If yes, continue evaluation. If no, not attracted.

3) Is his body language good? If yes, 1/3 of attraction now complete. Continue evaluation. If no, ignore/screen.

4) Does he demonstrate non verbal equal or higher value than myself? (Good style, having fun, standing with other people of high value, cool guy friends/cute girls, etc.). If yes, 2/3 of attraction now complete. If no, screen (screening meaning shit tests, bitch shield, etc.)

5) Does he look like someone I could be seen with at a minimum, and best case I could impress my social circle by being with? If yes, attraction complete. If not, ignore.

This isn't that high of a bar really. Notice it didn't say "Is he a stud? Is he hot? etc." It really says "Does he meet the physical MINIMUM to LET MYSELF be attracted to him. If you don't pass these, she typically will not ALLOW herself to be attracted to you.

Even if you have GQ model looks, if you strike her as douchebag/sleazy/greasy then you have failed one of the steps (in this case #4&5) and she won't allow herself to be gamed by you.


At this point, it's in your hand to move through the rest of the emotional progression towards sex/dating.

(Diagram courtesy Love systems)

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry, this is BS. Women change their minds so many times. How many stories have you heard about a women being completely unattracted to a man and then later utterly falling in love with him? Or meeting someone she's really not attracted to and would not have sex with even if he was the last man on the face of the earth....Until she sees him with another woman.

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